Hey there! So I have been going through a thousand thoughts in my mind about all things middle aged. It really is a crazy time for us as women. My thoughts have been: What do I do next? Where do I go from here? Who are my friends? What do I do now that my kids are grown, gone, building their own lives and, apparently NOT NEEDING ME!???? And then, just recently it came to me. “You know what you do next? You give birth………….AGAIN!!!!!”
Now, I don’t mean in the sense of childbirth. We have just spent the last 20 plus years giving birth and raising Gen Xer’s and the millennials , not to mention probably building a career along side of the already full time job of wife/mother/homekeeper/career woman. So what is this giving birth thing I am talking about? Well, it is a strange phenomenon in which we go down the path of, for lack of a better explanation, a re”birth” ourselves or start over and grow……again……ourselves in a new area of our lives. Reinvent ourselves as a person, woman, career professional, mother of ADULT children, grandmother, possible care taker of sick and/or aging parents in light of OURSELVES and NOT someone’s mom. May I introduced the MAW? Middle Aged Women and we are nothing but POWERFUL!
I just love how in the 80’s and 90’s we had DINK’s (double incomes, no kids), the new millennium we had women pounding out careers and stating that if we didn’t start one when we were in our 20’s and 30’s we were going to miss the boat. In our society today we have, SAHM’s, WFHM’s, WAFHM’s, and everything in between. I at one point was all of the above. And now, looking at being in the middle of my life journey I am a MAW.
And I have learned on my journey through the past four years I have been traveling down this path into a really “enriched” time of a woman’s life, having SO MUCH to share, offer, give away, but most of all, recognizing that never before have we had this much EXPERIENCE for the rest of our lives! We are HIGHLY qualified for the job that is set before us. ANY job set before us. And the beauty of it looks like this: NOW is the time to really shine! The accomplishment of raising children and having them not “need” us so much is the mark of us doing our first job of their 18 years is confirmation that the job as a mother was done correctly! And…..you worked yourself out of a job! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! That is what we are SUPPOSED to do!
So, looking at my situation, YAY! I don’t have the same job I had for 30 years! I worked myself out of it! And how freeing is that?!!! I really am coming to realize it is a gift you give yourself. The gift of self awareness and growth.
I will tell you that this transition to MAW has been one of great angst for me. I had NO IDEA it would be this hard! But I finally saw this lovely picture in my mind and realized for the sake of our children, self, career (if you have one or want one), husband, relationships and generally for the rest of your life, you must embrace CHANGE. It was the “AHA” moment I needed. Not only “THE CHANGE”, but the changes in the shape of everything in your life moving forward. The shape of the change in your body (like WOW! Where did THAT come from!!!!) to the shape of your relationship with friends; those may not be the same as they once had been. It’s time to let go of some of the old (lovingly so) and make some new ones. The shape of your relationship with your partner; everything from your love life, dietary needs and bedtime have ALL changed there! Your children must build NEW relationships with others in order to carry on in their lives; adding new people in the form of partners, children and careers. You are not the center nor most important relationship for them to have anymore. AND THAT IS O.K.!!! You are a MAW and there is a whole new world out there for you to see, feel, experience and it needs YOU!!!
I am so glad to give birth again at this stage of my life! I am learning new things I never had never thought of before. Our society tells us it’s the start of the end. I argue: YES and NO! Yes to the end of child rearing, all nighters of no sleep because children are up and down. Piles and piles of laundry. 85 grocery bags every time you hit the grocery store. Sheets of lasagna. Menstruation! And I say AMEN!!! Thank goodness it’s the END! But NO! Being a MAW is a gift! And, don’t we all love presents?!!!!!! I encourage you to love this one! It’s a chance to be new all over again but with so much more to give than ever before! We have time to give to so many more people, time for self care, time to reflect on the “not so good” times and correct and move forward with amazing times! Giving yourself permission to be something new if you didn’t like to old so much. And time to polish up the old and make it that much better.
Embrace “the change”. Embrace being a MAW. There is a whole new world out there waiting for you! And the best thing you can do for your loved ones, is to face it head on! Join me as a MAW and may together we take chances and cause a shift of thinking in our society. Not one of envious youth, but of magnificent MIDDLE AGED WOMANHOOD!